RULE THREE

 

RULE THREE

"So many you did that she got tired

because you boy

Abused rule three

Where less is worth more..."

With these verses begins one of the most beautiful songs by Vinicius de Morais, sung by Toquinho. It's a song that talks about the deterioration of a loving, trusting relationship, due to the small slips committed by one of the couple's peers. And that's how it works in real life. Small quarrels, misunderstandings, offenses... and suddenly you're moving away from someone who was once important in your life. Yes, because it's the small everyday details that make you stay connected to someone or cut the ties that unite you to this one. They are insignificant things, edges that, if not polished in time, become insurmountable barriers. And simply because some magic words lose their power over time, this relationship is weakening day by day.

Although Vinicius' poem talks about a couple, this can be applied to any and all relationships between people. Husband and wife, siblings, cousins, friends, acquaintances, co-workers... parents and children... yes, the small quarrels between people, if not resolved immediately, gradually take on such proportions that it becomes impossible to reverse the situation. And the solution seems so simple, although it is not...

Nobody knows how it starts. A misplaced word, the attempt to impose your desire, without caring whether or not you are invading the other person's space, the absolute certainty that you are right and the other is wrong... all this and many other certainties Individuals are laying down the bricks of the wall of misunderstanding between people...

We are imperfect, that's a fact. We seek encouragement from a superior force, asking it to guide our hearts and guide us always in the right direction, allowing us to be fair in our day-to-day choices. But... and there is always a but... this "fair choice" will always lean towards our own convictions. That is, as much as we try to clean our hearts and look at the world with the pure vision of a child, the path we have taken up to that moment, building each one's beliefs day by day, we will follow what we have learned during our journey through life. and we will be biased. We won't realize it right away, and we may never admit we're wrong. For, in our thinking, our steps are being guided by a divine flame that leads us to the truth and others are in the dark, they are wrong and cannot see the light. And most of the time we are the ones immersed in darkness, the ones walking on the edge of the precipice, so involved in our beliefs...

As I said, they are small things, of no value in ours or in the lives of others. But we give these little things such importance that, for us, they become something essential... but would they be, really so important in our lives, that they would be worth the sacrifice of an affectionate relationship? Well, if they don't have any initial value, then of course they aren't worth any sacrifice. But that's not the way we see things. For most people everything is always black or white, you can't understand the nuances between these two situations...

If we are involved in an argument, in the heat of emotion, we are going to get hurt for sure. The ideal is never to speak with and to someone when we feel that anger is taking over our reason. That would be ideal, but who said that the ideal is possible, right? As I said at the beginning, one misplaced word is enough and the fuse of discord is lit. And words that should never be spoken spring from our lips. And there's the big problem... words that come out of our mouth never return to it. And these have the power to hurt, hurt, destroy a relationship...

Is apologizing to the other person the way to go? Well, for that you must recognize that you are wrong and the other one is right. But you will hardly admit such a hypothesis, so certain are you of your offended reason. And you know what's worse? In fact, both people are usually right and wrong at the same time. I mean, it's a very complicated thing. After all, how can I blame someone if, deep down, they have some reason in their point of view? But I wasn't wrong either. And now? Am I going to stoop and apologize for something I didn't do? And then? What do I do?

It's like I said at the beginning... it's not something easy to understand. But life itself does not make it easy for us. Each person is a universe of their own, with their convictions, passions, desires... and their opinions are not always the same as those around them....

It's 07:57 on this cold and cloudy Tuesday, we are currently at 18ºC, with no expectation of a slightly warmer day. It is likely that we will have another day like yesterday, which remained cold the whole time... in four days it will be Christmas, time for renewal... May God help us to renew the feelings in our hearts, and give us the grace to we gets see the world with the purity and innocence of little children, for hers is the Kingdom of Heaven, as the Master who was born on the date we are going to celebrate...

May God bless us all, and give us a beautiful and wonderful Tuesday, full of Light and Love... See you tomorrow, God willing....