INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS

INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS

The relationship between people has always been something very...sensitive, to say the least. After all, people always expect more from others than from themselves. The expectations created, with some exceptions, are always about the performance of others. My failure is not mine, but the other person who did not support me enough for me to win the challenge I faced... exaggeration? Not so much...

When a relationship, no matter what kind, doesn't go well, it's always the other's fault. "It wasn't me who made a mistake, I always did everything right. It was so-and-so who didn't do his part". If we pay attention to our surroundings, we will see that this explanation is more common than desirable. Because we just can't accept that it's our fault too... it's easier to blame the other side.

In a work relationship, for example... communications between people always suffer some kind of noise, and they reach the recipient distorted, often completely distorted from their original context. And that, of course, is the cause of a thousand and one misunderstandings between the teams. No matter how careful you are when transmitting some kind of message, if there are intermediaries between the sender and the receiver, it will reach the recipient modified, corrupted in its initial idea...

And what about the exchange of messages on social media? Well, this is a dangerous swamp to walk through, full of pitfalls, quicksand puddles where, not infrequently, we end up diving headlong... A little misplaced word is enough to collapse relationships, as if they were built like a castle of cards, where moving a single piece is enough to destroy the entire work... we spend most of our day measuring our words, controlling our actions, so that our gestures do not hurt, in some way, the people who gravitate around us... yes, it really is something quite complicated...

And now, we come to a crucial point... family relationships... well, that's where things are simpler, isn't it? After all, everyone in this nucleus prays the same creed... is that so?

What we often forget when we talk about the family is that it is made up of individuals who, despite having a common origin, suffer all kinds of influence from the groups that gravitate around them. After all, it's not because your first influence is your mother that the individual will pray for your booklet all your life, is it? Even because, after the mother, there is the influence of the father, uncles, grandparents, cousins, brothers, neighbors, schoolmates, playmates... and so on. That is... the formation of this individual lacks diverse influences and often the end result is different from what was expected. Because the influences around you build a character that is often divergent from that of your family nucleus... and that's when conflicts begin, where both sides try to impose their point of view, their ideas about how life should be lived...

As you can see, living is complicated. A misplaced word can leave your neighbor in such a state that, many times, he ends up feeling depressed. And depression is a serious thing. And recovery is not simple... because the depressed person is in such a state that his self-esteem is at zero... and what brought him to such a state? Usually a chain of negative events that has always brought her down. And against which this one never got a plausible argument to rebut...

Always trying to put ourselves in the other's shoes is, perhaps, the best way to try to understand how to deal with situations that can often get out of control, if we are not careful with our words. For words lead to action... in fact, words are already an action. Often a poorly placed phrase hurts more than a blow applied against the other person... a little word pronounced at the wrong time can leave consequences for the rest of an individual's life...